I didn’t hate her either. She was my favorite character.
That’s what a lot of people don’t understand about Murphy. Words and actions are two different things. Did she know how to hurt people with her words? Yes. But her actions were always for the greater good. But somehow she’s “selfish” for sacrificing everything and everyone good in her life (by pushing them away for their own safety) in order to do right by people more in need.
She also wasn’t a bitch. She had depression. There’s a big difference. A lot of people mistake depression for just feelings of intense sadness. Not so. Once that fucker settles in for the long term, you find ways to cure it, cope with it, or die with it. And we saw from flashbacks and heard stories from her mother that blindness was not what caused her issues. Murphy herself says, “You know, even if I wasn’t blind, I would still be this way.”
Murphy coped with it in unhealthy ways. But she never actually hurt anyone (other than herself) on purpose. And when it came time to choose, she always chose right from wrong.
Maybe that’s why this stings so much. I deal with depression, I’ve had my struggles with the bottle, and a lot of people sometimes think I’m just cruel or a sardonic dick- When really, I’m just trying to get through the day without their particular kind of transparent bullshit. Notice: When people were genuine with Murphy, she wasn’t an asshole. She just cut through manipulative social niceties (Leslie) or simply cut to the chase (Felix). And with Max, it was always about protecting him (so much for that).
Even though she was living a dangerous life, she was also starting to live a fulfilling one. She was less isolated, she cut back on the booze and the illicit sex.
But the second she took Max’s advice and leaned into happiness and let him in- EVERYTHING fell down around her and he’s violently murdered in front of her. Letting herself be “normal” ended up crushing her happiness forever.
What a message! (I’m glad I don’t live in the In the Dark universe.)
This show had so much potential, but they chose to torture their audience instead. I really don’t understand how an entire writer’s room decided this was the best way to end the series. You went through years of pain with Murphy, only to end it with the ultimate “fuck you.”