I know it’s no one else’s problem or even effects their thoughts anymore. I feel forced to dwell in my failures. Trapped hiding in a town 12 miles wide. I just want normal. I want to still believe in true love, soulmates, destiny and spiritual connections.....I don’t want to believe someone’s life can be ruined for making a mistake. For believing in something that wasn’t there, holding on too long, trying to fix the unfixable, not giving up,.... I don’t care what’s being portrayed. I know what I did wrong and that’s not what I’m being punished for. I still wish I could fix it. I know I should feel like I shouldn’t have even tried and in a way I do. I’m not perfect.

More than anything I wish I could go back 2 years. That’s impossible. So I’ll disappear, be less than a memory, a reminder. I’ll choose where I can go from here.