Need some advise

I agree with Morepeanuts that a free course can be helpful. On the other hand, the personal guidance may be more productive. It is difficult to find something like that at an affordable price but there are some experimental products that can be really helpful in your situation. For example, an empathetic AI companion - Nova.

Nova was built based on coaching, neuroscience and CBT approaches by a team of top international experts from Stanford, Harvard and International Coaching Federation.
Nova is your digital companion, who can provide guidance, advice and even a coaching or meditation sessions to find new opportunities in life.
With Nova you will have private one-to-one virtual coaching sessions (in a messaging format) that will support you in accessing the clarity, wisdom and insight that will serve you the best in love, business or self care. You can join their first beta testers and get the AI companion Nova for free for a year.

/r/MeditationPractice Thread