A winch for self recovery is not a bad idea, but be sure to familiarize yourself with proper safety during usage because they can be very dangerous if not fatal if you use it in a way it was not intended to be used. You can also buy maxxtraxx traction boards to wedge under your tires which are always helpful. You can also install tow hooks/recovery points on the truck if you ever have a friend to help you out.
There are many methods of self recovery, each have benefits and drawbacks. I'll let you do the research and choose what's right for you.
Light wheeling with local jeep guys may warrant the small lift and larger, more aggressive tires, but I don't know your definition of "light". The essentials of offroading are ground clearance and traction.
As for sleeping inside of it, it really is ideal that you are under 6ft tall. Not to mention how tight that space really is when you have gear in the back.
75lbs of gear in the back isnt bad. Believe it or not, my dad is also a mechanic and carries about the same amount of stuff in his truck at all times. If you do lift the truck, make sure you choose the correct load rating for your springs if you plan on having 100+ pounds of stuff in the back on a daily basis.
A rear locker is not a terrible idea either now that you've elaborated on what you will be doing with the truck, but honestly it still isn't 100% necessary.
As for the bumper, you should traveling slow and being observant on the trails anyway, so the chance of a deer related incident should be minimal. If you are really paranoid about it happening, a bumper isn't a bad idea. The ARB bumpers are very costly though
In your situation I would find a good winch and bumper combo that I could buy in one shot. $400 winch and up to a $600 bumper.
It sounds like auxiliary lights are a good option for you. I'd say to consider it as one of your last upgrades.
Just remember, it's very very easy to spend tons of money on a truck. If you test your capability and your truck's capability, you can find out what you really need and save yourself money and a hassle.
If I had plentiful disposable income, however, you'd better believe I would buy an FJ60 and sink thousands of dollars on mods that I didn't need under any circumstances.
Have fun with your truck, and good luck!