If ur willing to drop this petty nonsense and stop tryna fkn slave me u have the offer to join my self act ‘journey/book club’ (til the deadline then ima just do it myself, idc if u dgaf bout this shit n wanna just have fun). U gotta remove all lines of comm but u can hmu when ur not a shy lil girl anymore and we don’t gotta talk bout this straight away. I’m the boss here (in exchange for ur insanity getting pacified no other strings attached) so keep ur attitude at home. Consider urself an intern so u drop ur special treatment expectations and the possibility of getting fired w every stunt. No commitments or acting like my gf

I ain’t satisfied w all the cptsd models/theories like cptsd is indistinguishable from PD clinically inner symptom wise but they’re way too diff. You can have cptsd but lack PD dsm criteria like entitlement (codep’s). They wanna make PD’s all one entity but that means BPD ain’t CPTSD in itself (I think Hermann says that). Walker’s 4F model seems to not consider empty schizoid core in common to all of em. Codep’s ain’t even a clinical term and ‘leading’ codep’s just use walkers model and/or have 0 damn idea how much in common they have w narcs. ‘Super empaths’ and ‘supernovas’ are just borderlines/fragmented cptsd switching, look how many ppl read that niche. Being a ‘fight/fawn’ seems like an oversimplification and neglecting so much more of it. It seems the only thing in common w all cptsd + pd is only the empty schizoid core. I ain’t even doing this to chase clout just a hobby tryna figure out if I can get rid of this emptiness but I would share all my knowledge that would help fix u as long as u read shit urself n not expect me to be ur therapist. Most of them books are self help and actually interesting to read trust me, it’s just like any other passion where u gotta read a few to get into it (assuming u don’t read self help)

I don’t buy the bad object shit either as a sole expl for why we do what we do. Rep comp is a much better expl. If u read body keeps the score u’ll see examples of like a girl who was a caretaker having her parents die and she started caretaking imaginary ppl w amnesia of original events, later to have that come out w all her memories back. I wanna dig deep on rep comp it’s fkn scary and weird having an invisible force like that guiding your life choosing your partners, free will is bullshit, I wanna work towards figuring out other unconscious hidden drivers of behaviour + how it impacts things like addiction. Fyi in a few days note down how u feel. Some rep comp examples in body keeps score was like some1 stuntin every year on the anniversary of a friends death. The start of this overwhelmed me w disso I wonder if I’ll be on autopilot replaying that