I don't know why I do it. I don't know why I feel better afterwards. I just know that my emotional being feels better as I feel the warmth trickle down my body. I suppose it is a release of stress or negative emotional energy. The quick changes my mind goes through never make any sense. I can have a nice day and then one word or sight destroys me. One song can send me into a spiral. Perhaps it's a way of me being able to have control of an emotion or sensation that I feel helpless about. Maybe it's the only control I have over my own existence. I've tried to get better and let the past go, but I know it'll happen again, it always does. I'll try to delve deeper and get to the bottom of this question if anyone cares to dig deeper with me. Otherwise I don't see the point in saying anymore