Sigh.

Let's start with basics: The notion that, say, women wear x and me wear y in a given culture (i.e. dresses, long hair, makeup vs ties and blazers) is 1000% a made-up social construct. There is no prenatal gendered urge to prefer the color blue or pink. Ffs pink was "the baby boy color" until a century ago and women wearing pants used to be illegal.

So for the sake of argument let's just set those "presentations" aside and be literally naked... Where does your argument go, then? Dicks and vaginas? Strip aside the presentation and does it have to come down to who's doing hrt and surgery?

Even IF it comes down to jawlines and genitals to you (and I sincerely hope it does not): There is no way to "fully transition" physically. This is because of the limitations of science.

Not the limitations of the human being.

My hair, my face, my tits, my dress, my boots, my pussy, my strap on, my SAHM social role, and my x chromosomes do not define my gender.

And to say otherwise is the absolute definition of transphobia.

Telling a nonbinary person that they have to present a certain way is the same as telling a trans woman she's not a woman because she chooses to not undergo physical transition. And would you agree that that is HER choice? And that her choice doesn't dictate what pronouns she asks you to use?

This sounds like some very painful internalized transphobia to me. And for that I am very sorry. But not as sorry as I am for your nonbinary "friends" who have managed to garner your approval; you might want to warn them about the specific qualifiers you have for their existence.

Read a book. Read "Gender Outlaw" by Kate Bournstein.

You'll be a happier person and so will everyone around you.