It's pervasive and leads to double standards.

Nichole is a self-interested user who lied and isn't interested in a relationship with daonte.

Tony is a self-interested user who lied, got caught with hookers and wasn't interested in a relationship with Angela.

Yet, according to many, Nichole has a duty to refuse daontes gifts and money and break up with him because he is an innocent "nice guy" who just wants love.

But when Angela bought Tony an entire motorcycle and caught him cheating with hookers the conventional wisdom was that she needed to break up with him and repossess the motorcycle. Tony wasn't expected to do anything that wasn't in his own self interest.