Honestly, I wouldn't worry to much about disapproval. The number of people who won't like what you've written and actually be willing to comment about it is incredibly small in comparison to the positive feedback you'll receive.

In my experience the only negative comments you usually get are from people who don't like that a caption is noncon or dubcon (which is usually superfluous because if you don't like those themes and I've tagged my caption as them, why are you even reading them in the first place lol).

Your ideas are fun and original and you do a great job of storytelling through written word. Seriously, compared to some other captions on r/hentaicaptions your sentence structure and grammar is flawless.

Of course the decision is up to you. It's always hard putting something you've created out for public criticism but it's is a surprisingly wholesome community considering the subject matter. So don't be too afraid and please keep writing!