I’ve been sitting on this comment for a few weeks but fuck it here it is:

When I was fairly young I dated a man who coerced and shamed me into having sex despite having told him that I wasn’t ready many times. I’m hesitant to use the word assault because the situation was so subtle and insidious that it the word doesn’t feel right to say. Long story short, after I found out he was cheating I also found out he’d given me an STI. Luckily, it was treated and cleared however when I told a few friends about it I was told it was my fault for not using protection and not insisting on him getting tested. That didn’t happen because I never gave consent.

Honestly, I wish Danni had taken a different approach and said something like sexually active adults get STIs. Get tested, take care of your reproductive health and fuck anyone who blames or shames you period. Having an STI doesn’t make you dirty or broken and should not destroy your life. Of course use protection and practice safer sex, but shit happens. Get treatment, move on and don’t ever talk about my body or my health ever again.

It seemed like Andy was the only person saying these things and it’s really sad. I’m sure I’m not the only person on this sub who’s had an STI but the messaging has been that STIs happen to dirty sluts and should be used to judge their character. That’s wrong and needs to stop.