I’m no expert but if you meet the criteria of an ad, shoot your shot respectively and don’t turn into a disrespectful asshat if things don’t go your way. If you don’t meet the criteria, move on and don’t respond.

Thank you! To any guys complaining about why women don’t post much on here or why it seems like there’s more men than women on here, this type of shitty behavior doesn’t help. I don’t know what the gender ratio actually is, but many of us definitely leave the sub because of messages from shitty men. You guys complain about not getting enough messages. We get flooded with toxic ones. Instead of trying to improve this sub or make it more female-friendly, NiceGuys have the audacity to tell us to get over it and leave if we can’t handle it. Well, we do leave. We call off our searches even if we didn’t find what we were looking for. We delete our posts. We stop replying to or even reading messages because we have to read 19 messages with unsolicited dick pics or “Hey bby, wanna suck my cock?” or “Hi sorry I no I don’t fit your criteria but is there any chance your interested in someone who is 74, 6’0, and slightly chubby at 584lbs,” before hitting 1 reasonable message. I once got a disturbing multi-paragraph PM from a guy describing in detail how he wanted to show up at my door, force me into nonconsensual sex acts, then physically invade and remove internal organs. Blocked him, immediately deleted all my r4r posts, and hit Ignore instead of Accept for all the rest of my unread DMs.

(So yea, for you decent guys out there who play by the rules, this sucks for you, too. If you want to fix it, do something about those creeps instead of complaining about female Redditors.)

Then at least once a month, there’s some clown with an upvoted post calling for even more restrictions to cut down the number of women posting here even more. Instead of self-reflection about why none of the women they message reply to them, and trying to understand things from our POV, they want to require picture verification before allowing women to post. Hun, there’s at least 5 other subs we can post in that don’t require photo verification (including the other Seattle sub), where we can still expect a large number of messages from men.

Implement a 3-strikes rule or something. Once a Redditor is reported for abusive or harassing PMs with proof, ban them.

/rant