First
Dating can be a huge waste of time and emotionally draining, but it can also be incredibly rewarding for many or most people. Most of the time, it's somewhere between the two extremes. It's not for everyone and that's okay.
What is it about sex you don't think you'd enjoy? Is this an extension of your privateness?
Second
This is maybe your biggest actual problem. Your parents' reaction can have a big impact on your happiness. You know your parents better than anyone here, so your suspicions are better than anyone's. All I can say is sometimes people surprise you.
Third
If you've not been diagnosed to date, depending on your age, then it probably doesn't warrant addressing any suspicion of autism. Aspergers (rightly) has been sunk as a diagnosis, I suspect largely because it was indistinguishable from many non-autism-related anxiety disorders. I have an alphabet of anxiety disorders and I score very highly on autism questionnaires too, but it means nothing. Autism is a developmental disorder. If it had a substantial impact on your life when you were young, most parents would probably seek professional opinion. I'm not saying you're not on the spectrum, but my suspicion is you'd hardly be anywhere on the spectrum that would leave you incapable of being loved. I have weird, specific needs and routines like so many other people and my partner doesn't generally care. Some of them he even thinks are cute or endearing.
Further
Yeah, I don't really like smalltalk all that much but I read just this morning another redditor describing small talk as two people killing time until they find they have something in common, or something to that effect. It's an interesting way to look at it instead of thinking of it as a chore to endure.
Most people like to exaggerate their good qualities to others. Most people aren't as amazing to date as they might lead you to believe. They might, more privately, feel exactly the same about themselves as you do.
Finally
Yeah, unfortunately death is an inevitable end for all of us. BUT you could keep yourself from experiencing so much joy if you obsess over what things will be like when they're over for whatever reason. Yes, gay men in some communities expose themselves to very high risk activities (sex, drugs, alcohol, violence, self harm) more than many straight men for various reasons. Consequently, a lot of these gay men experience high mortality but this is not universally true of all gay men. The risk of dying in young adulthood is pretty inextricably linked to risky behaviour. This means that some people are at a very high risk, but others are at a very low risk depending on how they live their lives. I suspect your ideal partner would be in this low risk category.
Should you come out?
If you want to. That's nobody's choice but yours.