Parts of your experience are eerily similar to one my family underwent. This was witnessed by my mom and her friend. And as astounding as it would seem, other experiences I've had at that place further corroborate that it must have happened.

Back in the mid 80s, I was around 4-6 years old (I can't pinpoint the exact year it happened) and the two-bedroom apartment I lived in with my mom, a friend of hers, my grandma and my brother became stage to a series of... strange occurences that led to my mom call on a couple of specialists to "fumigate" the place.

As they went about the hallway, with my grandma leading them, I was in my bedroom with my brother, and my mom was in the living room with her friend when an inky black silhouette with limbs and torso and head entered the living room, apparently in a daze. Mom described it as having no features, and yet a moving shadow.

It stretched to grab my mom's friend arm, but she recoiled and the figure then ran away and disappeared into one of room's corners. Activity ceased for a decade or so after that.

According to the people who went to clean the house, it was the work of someone who had intended to bring distress to our house (not physical harm), that they knew how the house was furnished and that after the cleansing that we would have to move the furniture around.

I found your story interesting due to the similiarities of your shadow woman and my mom's shadow figure and their intent on grabbing someone. But shadow figure only showed itself once, after the house was cleansed. Most of the activity in the house before that were sounds, noises like someone was messing with a terrine in the hallway, and the ambiance becoming "heavy" (people who experienced hauntings will know what I'm talking about).