Jimmy knew he was on the verge of catching the largest bass in the Northern Hemisphere-the Connecticut crocodile bass. The fish was a monstrosity, all four hundred pounds of saltwater and barbed scales, with a rather voracious appetite for anything its jaws could squeeze around.

“See anything down there?” asked Jimmy, sitting on the raised bow of their small boat. It was hardly sunrise and already the lake waters were splashing and jumping with movement. He adjusted his vest, checked the line on his rod, and took in a deep breath of the cold air. They’d set off late last night, just the two of them with their wives cheering them on the dock behind them.

Andrew shook his head and tapped his fishing watch-a $200 gift from his wife.

“Hell no,” he said. He stood up and nearly went tumbling into the black water when the boat shifted just slightly. “Fuck this. There ain’t nuthin’ out here.”

Jimmy shook his head and threw in another set of Godwinson worms-the wiggling critters were the length of Jim’s forearm and rich in proteins the Connecticut bass thrived on-when Andrew grabbed his arm. “I said, there ain’t nuthin out here. You’re costin’ us eight dollars a worm here!”

Jimmy gave an impatient sigh and yanked his arm out of Andrew’s grip.

In went the Godwinson worms anyway.

“What the fuck, Jimmy?!”

Andrew lifted a fist and Jimmy lifted a fist when the rod gave a tug. A hard tug and both men lunged for it. They pulled and reeled and pulled some more, and when the thrashing in the water finally stopped, they looked at their catch.

A bass but not the Connecticut crocodile.

“Like I said, numbnut, ain’t nuthin out here!”

Jimmy gave a sour nod and sighed, releasing the flopping fish.

It was sunset by the time the boat returned to shore, bearing with it a pair of forms covered in black tarp.

“Well here she is!” exclaimed Jimmy as he hopped on shore, beaming at the two wives waiting for them. He kissed his wife hard on her lips and turned back to the bobbing boat.

“Honey, you actually caught one!” said his wife and Jimmy kissed her all the harder.

“Told you I would!”

“Two of ‘em,” added Andrew’s wife, pointing at the second tarp. She looked closer and Jimmy sucked in his breath when he spotted an arm and a familiar $200 watch peeking out…

Jimmy forced a laugh.

“Oh, that? That was just bait.”