Are you familiar with Buddhism simple concepts regarding suffering and being in charge of your experience? I had read your no care for anyone comments in your history as well as other comments that allow me to empathize and conversely same time distrust your darkest comments intention as, I was a supposedly uncaring OCD in my head person once too. Help us understand here, you in post history your your high IQ and and your abilities, as well as you uncaring for any human and awareness something is off not feeling sorrow over deaths. You've chosen to avoid treatment and feel this one video was so important to you , you requested it. Which was it, was it weeks or months you've thought about it? Just today you provided care concern and respect to another and offered uplifting encouragement.
See what asking? You're not truthful and that's okay, there's an issue to address and maybe solve but only you can help that. If you want to engage with fragile tragic comments saying suicidal, you create cog dis with the countless examples of not and confidence. You say off the meds and no feelings, and mature, yet take no agency in your mental health? Its so contrasted with your ability to comment at length on entertainment. You're employed and brag of your intellectual abilities. So , on tough love not buying your bullshit and you don't buy it either. You're blessed compared to a raped mother in Uganda. You have ability and choice. You're asking for suicide videos to feel more and give you hope? Please hear me out: you're in need of self help brother, and its hard yes but can you see how odd your confidence and time spent doesn't jive with your responses here? You own this lie now that you hate people. Its not true. You should try Buddhism mediation a different therapist or med, exercise, or just a change of pace to spend game time on your life and others time. Its a comfort zone issue, and you're not this unique snowflake how can pull the helpless card when called out asking for a bad coping mechanism to some dark thoughts. You're aware of what's up but in a funk that is now controlled by you, by choice, but hard to see.
If you want or need help, your beliefs and ego reactions will have to modify to measured logic responses, not dramatic overtures. Sorry, truly, that I have experienced far too many similar tacts and tones that manipulate and contort others and themselves instead of straight up humility and help request. Your telling people you hate all of them, yet don't, and interact and comment with less dark than this post.
Too little time in life for bullshit. Suffering is out there, got that. Baby it and coddle the falsehoods? No way,you're too smart and don't believe your own bullshit.
Input output. You control and have become your suffering, like all humans.
Do you need money and what will you do to provide me some sort of promise if I give you what you want , this video, that it would be a bridge as you said to feelings and not hating this dullness and all other people? Would you contemplate return to medical establishment to find either better dose, med, or therapist or yoga class or guided meditation sessions? I'll pay- ?