Over the past year I have become close with a guy who has been diagnosed Aspergers. It's obvious in the way he speaks and conversation can be difficult as he often rambles about his interests or things unrelated to the conversation. When I first met him, I would try to guide him back to what I was talking about or what the conversation had been focused on.

But you know what? He simply does not see the social cues I put forward. Nor does he understand the flow of conversation and how topics change naturally. I can tell him specifically what cues mean what, or he can look up how to make conversation (which he has). However conversation in real life is far too fast for someone to think back on things they've studied on how to behave. That's because most people naturally have the ability to speak to others and make conversation without really thinking about it.

I chose the example of someone "saving" someone else because that's the position I have assumed with my friend. Without me, he would not have someone to walk back from class with. He wouldn't have someone to shoot the shit with on weekends, nor someone to watch shitty anime with him. Often he makes group chats on Facebook and, while we can obviously see who has read the messages, I'm the only one who responds and watches the videos he shares.

He tries. He tries harder than me and I fucking bet he tries harder than you. He has told me many times this year he wants to work on expanding his friend group and meet new people. But many won't give him a chance. Or they will but once they speak to him for a while will decide he's not worth their time.

Not everyone is on the same level of social functionality. Some people have a lot of trouble. When you fall into a cycle of "social exile" it can be near impossible to get out.

A lot of people seem to forget that we're all in this "life" bullshit together. It's surprising how few people are willing to go out of their way to be someone's friend.