I'm sorry that there wasn't anybody there for you when you were alone and needed support. It must have felt terrible to feel like people were oblivious to your struggles. Most of the time when this happens it is because people really don't know. I can't speak for the people in your life-- but when my sister started cutting I didn't go into full blown "she is self harming and is crying out for attention"-- i simply believed the little comments about how she had been scratched by xyz cat. I noticed the cuts, but didn't notice that something was really wrong until she told me.

The most important thing I would remember for yourself in the future is to not be afraid of reaching out and being honest about how you are feeling. Your personal struggles do matter to the people in their life-- they simply must know how deeply they are affecting you. Most of the time it is the first step in healing.

For your girlfriend... I think your feelings about her situation have more to do with yourself then her. It's okay to feel resentment about how she gets the attention when you didn't-- but you have to recognize that your logic is flawed and hopefully you will be able to heal and let go of it. It sounds like you friend does have a problem whether you want to admit it or not. Someone who cries out for help needs that attention. People once said to me during a serious depression where I contemplated suicide every day and made plans for it that I was just "crying for attention". I was. I wanted someone to help me stay alive when I couldn't. That was one of the cruelest and heartless things anyone ever said to me-- now that I am healthy and happier I feel enormous pity for that person and how twisted and ugly their heart is. I hope that this is not your fate too.

I think that in time you may be able to heal from your past but you may need help. Talk to your parents, share it with someone like a counselor or if you're really lucky a therapist-- someone who will listen and help you understand all that happened to you and the lasting affects it is having on your life (such as your relationship and feelings towards your friend). Either way, it doesn't make you a bad person to feel bitter that nobody was there for you when you needed them-- but it is something you will want to let go of it you want to have a happier life.