I'm not strictly talking about gender.
You talked about people consciously changing their discourse, but you must understand that you can't just shame people into not using certain words, when those words are still very commonly used today. I mentioned the N word because it's a very taboo word today, but it wasn't like that once upon a time. It was a very natural word to use back then, and telling someone off for using it back then would have just gotten people angry.
Today, a majority of people find nothing wrong with using words like "cow", and even more profane gendered insults are still commonly used. You talk about changing discourse to exclude these words, but a lot of people aren't having any of that. When you go out of your way to shame people for words that are natural to them, you're not doing anyone any favors. You end up getting people mad, and you yourself end up getting frustrated. It's a pointless, unnecessary debacle.
The reason I mentioned the N word is because it went through a slow, osmotic transition from being a natural word to being taboo. It takes a slow shift in public consciousness to make that happen. You can't just force people to act the way you want them to act. You can't just try to police other people's vocabulary and expect 100% compliance, because to them, it's not a big deal. And you're going to run into problems with Americans in particular, because of their love of free speech. You must understand that not everyone is as sensitive to the more esoteric aspects of deep gender politics as you are, regardless of whether they're transgender or not. When it comes to these gendered insults, they need to make up their own minds and come to their own conclusions. But you're not gonna change minds by booing them, because you hold no moral authority over them. You just can't shame them that way, it won't work. These people have feelings too, you know.
This entire thread has been very frustrating to read. I understand you and others here feel righteous and want to shape society to how you want it to be, but it's not gonna happen, at least not anytime soon. I'm not sure what exactly you can do, individually, to advance your cause effectively (besides amicably educating people on this issue), but booing people isn't it.
And let's not forget that you're defending Jill Stein, of all people.