I failed to notice your request for humor; And my semicolon usage may be considered improper. Good luck. [Empowered For Change

 I want to personally thank our principal, Mr. Bob Scott, and our guests for joining us in this ceremony. Fellow graduates, congratulations on a job well done. Through thick and thin, together we've arrived; To commemorate one of our most tremendous accomplishments.
Nelson Mandela once said that education is the only weapon that can change the world; A statement relevant to our gathering today; Where we mark the culmination of four years of hard work, with every reason to celebrate; For through it, we've acquired the means to make those changes. We've gained an appreciation of our diversity and integrated in numerous ways, revealing a will to positively change the world. While we recognize our success, it's important to consider what to make of it.
  Though we may feel like conquerors, high school is but a stepping stone towards our destination. Graduation marks an end to one adventure and the beginning of another. This new ride will also be rough and turbulent, with periods of calmness. How we adapt depends on our implementation of the skills we've developed here at Scioto. Recall the lessons taught here, so they may serve as a compass on our journeys, and remember to be true to yourselves.
Scioto was filled with delightful moments. We listened to Justin Bieber’s “Baby” in the announcements for a month straight. We supported our fellow Irish football players in their unforgettable playoff run. We go-karted the night away at After Prom and rode exhilarating roller coasters with friends by our side at Cedar Point – the memories are endless.

Today, graduates, we go in different directions: Some will pursue further education, some will serve the United States in protecting our rights and freedoms, and some will begin jobs in the real world as soon as tomorrow. However, no matter where we go, we've cherished these memories together under one roof. When we look back at them 5… 10… 15… years from now, may we truly realize how precious our experience was. We would not have succeeded without determination and hard work; And the support of our teachers, families and the community as a whole. We appreciate each of you. Today, we leave behind the familiar, but we confront this change with confidence because of the opportunities you've shown us. Four years ago, we stepped foot into Dublin Scioto wide-eyed and nervous; Wondering whether we'd survive the threatening fixtures and loud opinions. Today, however, we part ways not with tentative baby steps, but with bold strides of empowerment.

Thank you and good luck to you all.]