Firstly, that sucks and a lot of people go through that.

Good news though. Now is a time in history where you don't really have to struggle that much anymore. There are so many gay affirming churches and nice gay Christian men out there. You don't have to live a celibate life or think you are going to hell on your own.

I can tell you almost as a fact, all the people who tell you to be celibate, aren't celibate themselves. It is people telling you this, not God by the way. God made you how you are. You can tell because it's a nice feeling to be in love and have relationships. God wouldn't make it so you had to lie and be alone and sad and feel like there's something wrong with you.

But if you do believe that, why would you worship that God?

So you can either reject god, or find your own wisdom in the Bible or enjoy torturing yourself I guess lol.

Whatever you do, it doesn't actually matter if you have a boyfriend as long as you repent after. And why would god care anyway, everyone is a sinner. When everyone is, no one is.