Yuuuuuup.

How do you get out of this cycle?

Slowly. It’s been two full years since I started working on myself, I stopped smoking weed about a year ago, and I’m only just now starting to tackle the debilitating procrastination problem. I seriously fucked up my life in the meantime, but that’s trauma. Keep chipping away at it and don’t lose faith in the process. The process doesn’t necessarily mean therapy, I’m actually on a break rn. It just means taking time to honestly self-reflect, learn more about what healthy relationships look like (with yourself, with others, with food, sleep, and exercise, etc) and begin to actively apply those changes you learn about to your life, whether that means standing up for yourself or learning to cook or going to a sleep clinic or a therapist or the doctor. It takes a long time to get good at this, learning how to carve out a healthy life for yourself that promotes happiness, so don’t beat yourself up if it takes a long time or things go badly in the process. Just keep trying, and remember the only way out is through. I can honestly say I’m doing a lot better now than I was when I started, despite still having a lot of the original problems I went in for, and a handful of new ones. There’s no quick fix to the question you’re asking, as much as it sucks. It just takes time, and effort, and working on yourself.