I totally get where you are coming from, thank you for being open. Many times we have everything we could ever want, but we still feel a sense of incompleteness. You aren't a burden though. You are still a youngin' trying to find your niche in this world. It is okay to be selfish while you are still growing. Focus on you, dream big, and set goals for yourself. If you want to have a positive impact on the world, you should totally volunteer. Most importantly you must love yourself first. We are all a work in progress, no human is perfect. We must continue to work on ourselves, and always strive for the best. It may not be clear right now, but you have a purpose in this world. Through the ups and downs, God is only preparing you for that purpose. Continue to pray, and put your trust in God. I know that your parents may not understand but if need be, please seek medical attention. Reviewing your post history, I can tell you are passionate about writing. I am impressed, your poetry is phenomenal! Keep up the great work!