It's like.. a funhouse mirror. Whatever is typed comes back distorted, the meaning skewed. So let me try again.

"yes. acting formal on the internet makes you look like a fucking tool like god damn man you aren't writing a novel, writing a letter, essay, anything else"

Yea, perhaps. But I also don't need to drop myself to the immature action of cursing to get my point across. Or... perhaps I do. It seems so hard for others to understand.

"you're bitching about how you're a god damn loser who doesn't want a real relationship, because they haven't been in one before?"

"all you're telling me is that basically your shitty predicament is all your fault"

I truly resent this view. It implies I could have changed this situation, if I made different choices... I'm sorry, but the only choice I could have done differently was to choose to exist, or to not. Imagine being isolated for a generation. Having been homeschooled, schooled well, yet ONLY at home. For reference: 98% of people, in a survey of people homeschooled, had at least 1 'extra-curricular' activity per week. At least some opportunities to socialize with people of their own age. But now imagine you grew up with zero. Only being TOLD what to do, not learning how to socialize on the base level that everyone normally learns at childhood.

Do you begin to understand yet? I want a real relationship, almost more than anything. Yet, I can barely converse well with(relatively) close family members, and so... is that possible?

One of my earliest memories is such: Kid throws ball from neighboring yard> I want to play with said person> ask parents>denied. The details got vague, but I haven't forgotten how that felt. Such a small thing, you'd not think anything wrong with it, would you? And yet, that is basically how my life was. I had NO 'choice' in the matter, except to kill myself instead of living. That's not a choice there, though. That's just giving up.

"we're supposed to feel sorry for you over that?"

I don't want your pity, or remorse, or sadness. I just wish people could understand. What is it that gives you the right to speak so highly above me? I bet you had a normal life, had friends, got to socialize, again with people of your own age. Just as you, apparently, can't understand my existence... I can't fathom at this point, what it would have been like to have a normal life. Yet, I can still have empathy for the situations of others.

"honestly, the wheelchair-bound, obese, and bald are way more on the up and up"

This is the only part I'd have to agree with, because... even they did get to socialize, and learn that aspect of society, in most cases. But you say Pathetic. You say this is all my own fault. You imply I had a choice, in being this way. Do you still think this?