I think you’re probably best off talking to him and his family about your concerns. Hindu wedding traditions can vary from family to family as can the meaning of individual rites. You might have to create something for yourself that doesn’t follow any of the normal traditions.

I would also say that you might want to consider your relationship with your fiancé. Even if something meant that a bride was being given away 100 or 1000 years ago many if not most people understand that relationship dynamics have changed dramatically. I can’t speak about your SO’s family specifically, but few of my friends would consider themselves to have the status of property in their marriages.