Honestly, I bet most toxic people have bpd. I wonder how many undiagnosed mental disorders there are. I think I saw there was an estimate that 50% of the population is undiagnosed. I think it's probably more if you include anxiety, depression, bpd- which everyone seems to suffer from tbh. How can you not in such a shallow world?

I wish my dad was born in this day. We have the same illnesses and i REALLY fucking struggle, everyday. It's very, very debilitating. And I've been lucky enough to try so many medications and therapies. I received healthy, stable love from a family- something he never got. Everyone deserves their parents' unconditional love. It's a birthright.

He was born in a communist regime during wartime on a poor farm with abusive, strict parents. Abuse was normal, even encouraged.

I read the story of the step-dad in Russia punishing his kid by forcing him to put his fingers in the snow, until he lost them. I don't doubt my dad suffered similar- he has very odd habits/mannerisms.

He punished me a few times with sleep deprivation. Makes me wonder how often his own parents did that to him.

No wonder he self medicated with alcohol. I used to judge him, but I understand now. It's really hard to always have 100 thoughts- especially if the majority of them are negative. You can't just "will" them to be positive.

He's a sensitive, sentimental man. Was always listening to love songs when we were growing up. Yet he married a gold digger that never really loved him. That must've been hard