I don't think "we" overall are. I think some of this allure phases out as a guy gets older and his everyday life is less surrounded by mostly straight dudes like it is at places you're required to be, like school.

I think when guys are in school around a mostly straight community, they develop a type of guy they like in that environment. That guy's personality and style might represent only 5% of the type of straight guys out there as is, so when you move to the gay world, you're looking for a small percent of an even smaller percent of a type of guy you've grown fond for. It can seem like something that's exclusive to the straight world when it really has to do with the lower numbers of the gay world. I keep meeting a wider and wider variety of types of gay men and really think we cover the full spectrum you see in the straight world. With acceptance, our spectrum is broadening as more types of guys feel comfortable coming out as they are and not feeling like they have to change either way.

When it comes to porn and stuff, I think the reason guys like the straight guy scenario because it's a shortcut in telegraphing the viewer that this guy might be hard to get or it might not be a sure thing. Half the emotions that are a turn on in a real life situation are the one excitement mixed with uncertainty. It's that tension that it might not happen that's exciting. Porn where you know they're both ready to go and into it without any challenge can be less exciting. I think that's why there's a whole range of types of porn that try to introduce this challenge or thrill of the hunt. Straight guy stuff is just one, but there's a ton of wrestling stuff, Bdsm, and even darker forced role play that caters to that boredom of the sure thing. It shows up in all men, like how the bikini always gets ranked hotter than full nude.