I’m so sorry you feel this way. This made me sad and I don’t like the fact that anybody could view themself/another person like this. Racism disgusts me to no end, and I hate that this didn’t surprised. I’m not surprised somebody feels this way and I think that’s a problem. I’ve seen all of your points happen in real life, where people are negatively stereotyped and treated as objects. I can’t say much, but please don’t hate yourself because of your race. You aren’t less of a person because of it. I’ve never experienced racism and I couldn’t even imagine what you’re going through and feeling. I really want to say more but I just can’t. You aren’t a bad person and by having sex with a woman and you are not bringing down her value.