It’s likely that he’s very used to jacking off so takes a lot longer to cum from sex, which is more common than you’d think. Honestly, just communicating with him about his wants is your best bet, all guys are different. Some will love hand jobs and others will think they’re just okay.

I’m with a guy who can take a long time to finish and with BJ’s he only gets off through deep throat. Used to have a bad gag reflex like you, but we spent a couple of sex sessions working to see how far I could get down my throat and have also practised with a toothbrush, and now my gag reflex is basically gone. Now I’m able to make him cum quicker and in copious amounts!

I think just ask whether certain acts appeal to him or not. Openness is important. I too felt bad for not being able to get my BF to cum at first since it was easy in past relationships, but just raise this with him and he can help you out.

And remember that sex can also be extremely pleasurable without orgasming.