Our last mandatory session of couple's counseling.

I finally decided to tell the truth about what was happening every time I tried to get help for the fact that I was being physically, sexually, and emotionally abused by my wife. Mind you, this all started because I had been accused of domestic abuse as though I was the aggressor.

Counselor recommended individual counseling rather than marital. Individual counselor got me out of that house and got me started down the path of divorce, on medication, and actually moving forward with creating healthy relationships and getting out of the toxic one I was in.

The fucked part is that to this day, I still have trouble calling what was happening to me rape. It... By all definitions of the word was. I was being repeatedly coerced and physically abused until I gave in. She needed me to be indebted to her, and sex was just another way she kept me under her thumb. At some point I didn't even enjoy it anymore. I still struggle with intimacy because of the psychological damage, but I'm grateful I got out of that relationship with my life. She never would have killed me, but I would have killed myself.