I've put together some questions ya'll may have.
Q: Why is one image smaller/bigger than the other?
A: Yeah I have a 8-year-old PC and sometimes images save weird, I'm sorry about that for real.
Q: This is a bad idea, why did you post it?
A: Yeah, I understand it's probably not that great, just my idea for something unique that isn't fancy acclaim, you have to admit it's a little unique.
Q: Why the crazy stat buffs and debuffs, name change etc?
A: I feel the Wis and MP fits the "magical" part taken from the original description, Machete being a synonym for sword according to research (Because there already is a Cutlass from epic pcave so I wanted to make the weapon stand out a little, especially with the dope sprite Aurum made, it had and got in this idea more potential then fancy acclaim) The SPD and DEF also fit the description, which says the machete is hard to wield. It also I hope balances out the rest of the item. The damage was chosen to be closer to acclaim's but not as a nod to the original in-game meme of fancy acclaim.
Q: Why the zone-carrying non-purifiable debuff? Doesn't this make the item bad?
A: I think the item may be too overpowered if you can just swap the blade out for a good one after you spawned a portal and carry out on your own merry way. This makes the UT situational, and not a non-fancy downgraded acclaim just used to spawn portals for free. I also think that one certain melee, that its ability makes no sense, and is ppe btw lel xd (That hint should give the identity away for sure!) needs to have a truly situational UT, because who plays pally and warrior. (This is a joke people)