I can only give you my experience.

My dad was a piece of shit. He left my mother to go screw a 19yo (he was 53), never talked to me or my sister ever again, left us credit card bills to pay, disappeared for 4 years and then killed himself.

At the news of his death i was distant and could not care less. My family was in shambles and they were all losing their fucking mind over his death and i repeat, i could not give 2 shits about it.

A year and a half later, one morning, i thought i was going to die. I was walking on a bridge on my way to work and my heart started racing, cold sweats, tunnel vision and i could not walk anymore.

2 years of absurd anxiety and panic attacks where i was going mad because i did not even know what the fuck anxiety was. Lost all my friends because they thought i was going mad, lost my job, lost multiple jobs, became emotionless, changed completely who i was and became a shell of a human being.

15 years later here i am, got better…? No, just learned how to deal with mortality and everytime something “unexpected” happens i’ll take it as a step closer to my own death, with a dark smile added to it.

I hope this help

Whatever happens, don’t lose yourself in the midst of it

Best of luck