So, you’re obviously a piece of cheese that’s fallen off the proverbial cracker, but seriously, I want to talk about your home.

I’ve stood and looked upon it, and I want to commend you on its qualities. The broken packing crates that the spring rains have bunched up against the beams. And how you have them smashed ever so preciously against the graffiti, the blues, the reds, the whites, it’s patriotic after all, wow! I think you need a little purple though. Purple is regal, and we can’t have too much of that, let’s face it. Think of the dominion?

The dead cat though, that took imagination, and sets you up in the top percentile of designer genius international. And then there is the pungency of rotting flesh, even better than the heady waft of creosote that rises in the morning breeze. No sir that is truly what makes a home. You, for one, have created the perfect place to be.

A bridge, if one could make it a home, is your glory. You’ve done it! I take my hat off to you. You couldn’t make an argument if it ran up your ass and down your fucking face, but you have an awesome hovel under that bridge. And why not, you’re a fucking troll after all.

So yes, enjoy little troll, just like all the other trolls on the Internet.

Now, big people are talking!