Well obviously I was talking in context of my previous comment.

Your last bit of advice was to talk to a therapist and I already explained that I have tried that and it didn't help.

The cost of therapy is annoying because it takes nearly a whole day's work to afford 1 hour of therapy and that is just too much for what felt like such an insignificant benefit.

I used to exercise regularly, lift weights, run, swim. You know what it did? It just made me better at those things and had very little positive effect outside of them. Hitting a new PR in the gym didn't make getting reprimanded at work any less stressful. Also 50% of the time I hated exercising and I found it stressful just trying to force myself to do it when I was exhausted from work. (like falling asleep in the mid afternoon tired).

You can call me whatever names you want. I'm not the kind of person who is affected by that. I never feel the need to prove myself or anyone wrong.

You work hard for whatever reason to prove something to yourself and I don't but we both still end up the same. None of it will matter when we're dead.

Nobody will care about whatever sacrifices you made in the end. 1 or 2 generation out and people probably won't remember you ever even existed.