Not the parent of an adopted child, but a brother. I was an infant still, and she was 6. She wasn’t American, so she had to learn English, and she hadn’t really been to school, so she started a bit late. She also underwent several surgeries to correct deformation in her lower legs/feet from Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. She suffers from ADHD and has the equivalent emotional range of a 14-year-old, despite being in late 20’s. I know exactly what my parents would say.

I haven’t regretted having her as my sister for a single moment these past 21 years, and I know my parents would easily do it the same way again. For all the trial and error, all of the childish mistakes made by my sister as she tries to understand what being an adult in her life should be, my parents would do it all again at the drop of a hat, because she got a family who loves her and an opportunity to become her own individual.

As the brother of an adopted child, I’d say the best thing you as an adoptive parent can do is if they’re around the same age as my sister is to make them feel welcomed. I can imagine it’s really hard to change your life entirely between 5-7; I think the most important time in an adoption is the first months, because you get to make an impression on them and really learn who they are. My advice is also to LOVE! Love them truly and honestly. Love them like the family they are and the rest will follow.