Quite literally the foundation of your relationship requires your own suffering in more ways than one.

One more thing, every time people talk about this they interject with their own opinions about this as if all trans people feel the same.

Where exactly am I suffering in this relationship? Is it because he loves me for being pre-op? What if I don't want SRS? What if want him to please me there sexually?

Honestly, I think trans relationships with straight men who aren't attracted to dicks are often traumatic and unfair for both parties. Straight men are biologically programmed to find dicks repulsive, they don't need to get over "cultural sexism" or whatever. Trying to force them to love me just sounds like pure suffering.