Turns out Bob's Burgers can literally save lives

CPR recertification is a joke, even knowing how to do it sort of is. You either do it or you don't. I cannot stress enough the most important aspect of cpr is to mentally tell yourself not to stop because youre "hurting" them. The only thing you need to know about CPR is to place the hands at the nipple line and what 100 BPM is like (find a song).

What people never fucking do is go 2 inches deep, I can't tell you how frustrating it is when there's a witnessed arrest and the police are first on scene and the cop (or bystander but you know, theyre not a professional) is doing bad cpr. You'll hear cartilage (not ribs) break if you're doing it correctly. If you don't hear that, you're just giving them a tit rub and blood is not circulating.

Defibrillators walk you through the entire process and the Heimlich is impossible to do wrong, all you're doing is creating positive pressure in the thoracic area/abdomen to dislodge something from the airway, it's like reverse breathing. All you need is a general idea of the motion and again, to basically perform the motion violently.

CPR isn't a diminishing skill, you just have to trust yourself. It's not complicated. The AHA doesn't even recommend rescue breaths anymore, and usually they'll be asphyxiating on their own saliva anyways. You need a suction unit and a bag-valve mask.

So, I get the point of this rant is not to make people not take the course--definitely do and hands on experience cannot be replaced. That said, a video tells you everything you need to know about defibrillators, cpr, heimlich, etc

You have to have faith in yourself, don't let some dipshit on Reddit tell you you can't do cpr because it's been a few years. Never stand around doing nothing.

/r/BobsBurgers Thread Parent