I have been informed that I claim too much and basically been told to stop. I have claimed quite a few cards because it's around Hallloween and I am trying to make up for the deep depression I feel because I cannot go out and celebrate. Not to mention I thought if I always kept the number of cards I sent above those I claimed (which I have) then I'd be fine... more than fine because some people claim cards but never offer one (which is personally fine with me, but there are those who require flair or past offers to claim cards... it was like this that I remember three years ago). Plus I cant claim Halloween cards any time but now so my claiming might be excessive now but would slow down after Halloween. Apparently I just dont deserve cards, I don't deserve to be happy, I dont deserve to be a part of something that makes me feel human again, I just dont deserve it. I mean no one knows the full extent of what I am going through, you should never assume someone is claiming just out of greed or whatever. I keep every card in a box in my room, if not displayed somewhere in my room. I got a special new box for my Halloween cards with intent to use them to distract me from the depressing stuff. Now I cant stop crying... looking at that box of cards makes me feel sick knowing that people didnt want me to have them... i just feel awful...

I'm sorry...