You yourself admit that she did not feel safe enough with the therapist to do work. How can you trust them to diagnose (ESPECIALLY given the medical misogyny and misunderstanding of women and girls with ADHD) when they couldn't even do their jobs successfully to get her talking?

Please. Please see that your daughter is being villainized here when all she needs is supports. Her biggest crimes are about forgetting things and lacking timeliness. Those aren't malicious acts! She is a joyful, loving girl who tries to bring laughter to folks around her. Don't punish her for clearly having an unrecognized disability by assuming malicious intent.

If you can acknowledge that your daughter has a good heart please give her the benefit of the doubt.

Please. Get her help. What's the harm in looking into good supports for ADHD children? You'll give her something helpful even if she isn't ADHD? That's the point of parenting, isn't it?

Please. Please stop being your child's bully.

And watch this: https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMFc3ytY2/