I just happened on this sub, so I don't know the vibe of this place, but perhaps we shouldn't label people as gay (or straight) unless they themselves say they are?

Sexuality can be a complex thing by default for some people. And even if people are way deep in the closet, and labeling them as gay in some attempt to force them to come out, is only gonna have adverse effects for people who struggle with self acceptance.

I'm 40 years old and eventhough I don't identify as straight, I'm also definitely not attracted to men. My older brother is gay, most definitely my best friend, yet people often thought I was gay, and thought my brother was straight.

Simply because I'm a kind/gentile guy, and have a fair bit of femininity going on (supposedly). Whereas my brother comes-across fairly 'alpha-man'.

I've never felt offended by gay guys who came-on to me, or thought I was gay, but there is something to be said about people who just can't fathom a man with "feminine" traits not being gay. And it's gay people and straight people who do this.

Which is just as problematic as people who can't fathom an alpha-type man not being straight, because all gay men are supposedly overly effeminate queens.