Shit yes, this came around at just the right time.

You know how all your life you're told to chase your dreams and do what you love and all that junk? It's what I did, and after an arduous college career I now find myself with a degree in a field that I love that isn't hiring. When I express my grievances people still give me that tired piece of shit advice as if it's still relevant to my situation. Because I did that, and now I'm here. "Well, at least you're doing what you love", did you not fucking listen? I'm not poor because it's what I love, and I don't hustle for part-time positions as a cleaner, cashier or store room stocker because it's my true passion. Being an adult and working the same jobs people ten years younger can (and sometimes do) really hurts the fucking ego. More than that, I rarely get enough hours in to break even, so my savings are close to depleted after almost a year of this shit. I'm not in debt (yet), but this (and a fairly useless degree in a field that technically doesn't even require one) are the few things I have going for me.

Mentally, I can no longer justify the money and time and energy I spent on my ridiculous degree. I already felt like that when I was in college, and now that I'm out it's an inevitable conclusion. I want to do something else. Something with money and job stability and maybe even status and because college is affordable-ish where I live my problem is more with whether I still have the time to find out what I'm capable of doing than the money and part of me feels that continuing to look for jobs as an artist/graphic designer/illustrator in fields that have too fucking many of them already is just digging myself in deeper.

And, I guess I just want to be validated. I want someone to tell me that money and job stability is a good reason to chase after something, that my opinion is as valid as the altnernative one that I've been told all my life. That you did this, and that it worked out for you. The way I see it, I'm currently doing jobs I don't care for at minimum wage, might as well do work I don't care for for good money, right?

Sorry for being all whiny about this but I feel stuck, even more so now that it's the holidays and I'm at my parents' for the entire week.