Try to breathe and relax.

My first time was with someone who wasn't a virgin, and I was in high school. It wasn't magical. I had sex with him after blowing him to completion so he'd stop bugging me for sex. It was pretty gross behavior on his part tbh.

I also had sex with two men who were virgins, one was 20, the other 22 or 23. Even though they weren't my first, they both meant a lot to me and left a lasting impression.

Try not to worry about what might have been in high school, it probably wouldn't have been a spectacular experience either. High school sex is awkward, there's never anywhere safe to do it and you end up having a lot of risky questionable sex.

Virginity is allowed to mean whatever you want it to mean, and you're allowed to have the feelings you have right now. Give it some time.