I have a lot of personal problems in my home life so I told this guy I really did like that we can have fun and go on dates, but I do need to focus on myself. We ended up getting really close and dating for about 2 months and he was honestly amazing but my problems at home were getting worse. My mother is heroine addict and my brother left. Also everything was moving so fast with this guy I was having dinner with his family almost every night. I think it was everything I needed a break from so I went to stay with my friend who is my ex in colorado for four days. Before I went I told him this and he distanced himself greatly. I told him that I Have no feelings for this ex (which I don't. its been over for two years. we did go through a lot together our best friend and roommate died when we lived together and his mom died two weeks ago) We both don't really have any family and have always been there for each other even when we don't want to. so I thought this trip would do us some good. Since (lets call him kyle) wouldn't speak to me I offered to not go. He has a strong family and I don't think he really understood how badly my family situation tore me up. I shared that I was very depressed (I was also withdrawing from SSRI's) and that I needed some time in the mountains to clear my head. He said its okay go but were done fooling and that he didn't want to see or talk to me. I told him I would stay and be in a real relationship with him because he is honestly a great person. But I was crying and emotional on the phone which I regret now. I think because of this ee refused to talk to me in person. Ive been dumped over the phone and it is super disrespectful to me. I think that is what really what set me off. I freaked out and said some hurtful and untrue things. I apologized for everything I said, and it's true I am very sorry. I had a lot of stress and lashed out my emotions on him pretty hard. I also wasn't trying to toy with his emotions by not having a relationship but I think he took it that way. But I feel like I am owed an apology as well. Or am I wrong? I would like to continue to be friends with this guy but it is bugging me that he did kind of dip out on me for a bit there even when I opened up to him about the antidepressants I've been on. When this happened on the phone a week ago I made him promise to talk to me in person once I got back from Colorado. Its been a week and he messaged me about it and I'm back and I don't know what to do. I really want things to work out even maybe just as friends. But I feel like he isn't trying to understand me.

This whole thing has made me realize I really do like him and want a relationship. But at the same time i feel like neither of us handled the situation to the best of our abilities.