Fun anecdote: I used to go to this underground dive bar for gigs and every damn time there was a toilet or two smashed...

One night I walk into the toilets. I'm kinda pissed. The only free spot is a smashed toilet in a stall that is smashed all the way down to the point where it can just hold the amount of water that normally sits in the bottom of these toilets, the size of a bowl of cereal. I figure my bladder is not too full and I could just top that little piece of porcelain up to the brim.

These are Australian style flushing, so rather than half full toilet with a vortex suction swirling flush (North American toilets) it's like a very small amount of water with a heavy violent drop from the cistern type flushing mechanism. I can't remember what it's called, think suction vs push. This means a rather splashy flush for our toilets. If you ever flush with the lid up and seat down you will get water all over the seat.

My aim is good, my pee estimates are perfect, but my cognition and forward thinking was way fucking off. I hit flush at the same time as I realise what is about to happen. Picture Indiana Jones & The Temple of Doom. I dive out of the stall as it violently launches my piss all over the walls.

I was lucky that day.