Well, I didn't make it. But this has been a pain to write. It keeps saying it's too long despite the count being under the error… And I don't want to dilute it too much. This is already diluted. SO much more happened around this experience and in my life in totality. But here goes:
I have a silver angel, most people have a gigantic white one. I even ran into a post where someone was talking about a "too large to fit into the room white celestial being". It pertained to a coma or something. Anyway, that's an angel. One is not better than the other per se, they serve different roles. The first time I saw one I was with my girlfriend in her suv as she was about to leave my house. I was a new Christian, became one because, and at the time was experiencing all sorts of supernatural events in my life – God and otherwise.
My gf had a headache. Suddenly I was inspired to touch my forehead to hers. I did and she instantly exclaimed how it was gone and went on and on about how cool it was. My attention was suddenly drawn to outside the vehicle. I "saw" (not with my eyes) a HUGE 25 ft. white angel. I was inspired to tell her and did.
Next day I step into church quite late. Barely in the door I immediately hear the pastor going on and on about a huge 40 ft tall white angel (I believe it was somewhere in Ezekial he was reading). I stopped dead in my tracks, amazed, but realized it was perhaps bias so I just held onto it.
During this time a friend was having a recurring dream and incessantly asked me what it meant. I told her I had no idea plus I was wondering why she was even asking me (she was Atheist leaning to Wiccan which she eventually became) and she said "I thought God interpreted dreams". Well, yeah I had read that in the Bible but for me my dreams had been quite clear to that point. They weren't bread rolling down a hill or anything like that….they were literal places and acts mixed in with some symbolism, not just straight symbolism like that or hers.
Soon after that I walk into my mother's room and on her tv is "Extreme Prophetic" with Patricia King. I am instantly drawn. They talk about ministering to homeless, the needy, etc. I find it interesting. Before I know it she is "prophesying out" to some guy out there about the same exact recurring dream as my friend. I am floored. I even wonder if it was even meant for me.
I loved the interpretation and felt that it was deep. I called my friend and told her but she didn't like it and she, if memory serves correct, had two different ones from psychics she preferred instead; But for me they didn't feel nearly as meaningful. Plus, if you have two you don't have one in my book.
That stellar, spoke to my soul interpretation convinced to sign up for a soon occurring "prophetic school" with the Prophetess and go. After all, the psychic who led me to Christ (atypical conversion story) told me I would soon be taking a trip. So why not? (but she was convinced that it would be out of country, but that never happened).
But before I went I had one more experience to take with me. I was in our kitchen at the haunted house we used to live in (I've lived in like 30 different places and only one other one was “haunted” with electronic phenomenon. But this house was undoubtedly supernatural stuff and multiple ppl experiencing it, etc.). As I was encountering some of those "black dots" I wrote about in a previous post I turned my head toward the place in the house where I would normally worship and in the corner I "saw" (this time I did see a more visible being but just the impression) a 6 ft entity. I saw no distinct features whatsoever. It was quite smooth from what I could tell. Not even muscular like the huge white ones. I turned back into the kitchen, staring at the faucet zoning out and then a word came to me: I have a silver angel. After being like, "COOL! What does that mean?" I finally calmed down and tried to leave.. that's when I turn and one "black dot" flew right at me. I flinched, reeled, shocked I didn't hit the floor (see previous comment history).
Soon thereafter I went to the prophetic school 500 miles away, and was like, "Hey. I'm here for the school. I signed up online."
"Well, you're not on the list."
"What? I know I signed up online and paid."
"I'll check again." "...." "Yeah, you're not on there."
That is when the woman's head tilted much like a dog trying to understand it's master talk, and then she suddenly says with ALL confidence and a sparkle in her eye, "You know what? Go right on in!"
I was hesitant and asked her if she was sure. She was (this is not the only time I saw that head-tilt followed by some real confirmatory action/event btw – and those more pointed and out of the blue). I asked God where to sit. He said front and center so I altered my course from the back where I was headed and did.
I was sitting in front of the middle table with the Prophetess Patricia King and a man and another woman. As I sat there I heard them prophesying to others. AT LEAST two others sat down and were told at the end of each reading about their "HUGE, white angel" (muscles upon muscles too). Too weird I thought. How many confirmations is that at this point? How did I even wind up here in the first place?
So then it was my turn. They ask me my name and I tell them. It's a Biblical name so when they said "that reminds me of (same name)" I found it awful hokey. They tell me all sorts of things you'd expect from a loving God. I honestly had, and even LONG after this, still had a hard time believing any of it due to the insanely horrible and difficult life, which was a mistake of enormous regret.
Anyway, we get to the end and it's time for the angel reading. I expect the typical "go-to", not that there's anything wrong with a HUGE white angel but the skeptic (dense person) in me thinks the whole thing is still just psychological placating, etc.
That's when it happens.
The woman looks are me (not the Prophetess but the woman next to her). As soon as she does I feel COMPLETELY without airs and on display, and off balance... as it is like NOTHING I've ever felt before. And I feel something like an access panel has been brought up out of me from behind my head and she can now see EVERYTHING – like my source-code. Now... like I said, I've been to many psychics and had interesting experiences through them but this was POWER, and even after having them blow my mind in ways this was on a whole 'nother level!!
Then she speaks, "You have a ...silver?? ...angel? .... I don't even know what that means. I've never seen that before. I don't even know what that means!" and is quite perplexed.
SHE JUST TOLD ME SOMETHING ONLY I HEARD IN PRIVATE 500 MILES AWAY AND EVEN SHE DIDN'T KNOW WHAT SHE WAS SEEING MEANT!!!
I am dumbstruck. I am wide-eyed at this point and simply in awe, unable to speak.
The Prophetess chimes in and says, "I do. I know what it means." We both turn our attention to her, the woman who sees the angels in her confusion is just as intrigued as I am at that point. "It means redemption."
Now, just a word on that. I ....have been through a lot. Too much for most to even begin to get. So much of what I've been through has been entirely invisible, psychological, etc, it is not understood one iota by anyone who hasn't faced it, and even then there are degrees that most people, even those versed in the stuff, tend to minimize the effects of it. They don't factor in comorbidity or the type of installed processes that negate positive factors they were still able to functionally utilize. Also, it's been 10 years since this experience and I've fallen hard since then. I messed up, gave my past and others FAR too much power over me. But I FINALLY get it now. And I DO plan to help others and make amends with the understanding that I have picked up along the way. I know I can actually do a lot for certain folks most would shy away from (and for good reason). Having a special angel doesn't make one better than others. In fact, it could mean the total opposite on many levels. The worse off someone is the more "specialized" help they need. I've barely made it this far and in fact shouldn't be alive. But those are stories for another time...
So anyway, a couple of added parts to the story: 1) each time someone was prophesied to a witness would write it down as it was happening. I still have my paper, have carried it around for about 10 years now and it's falling apart. Time to get it laminated. Still very readable. Yes, even the silver angel part.
2) The next day the Prophetess was like, "Welcome to the first day of Prophetic School!" I raised my hand, "First day? Then what was yesterday??" "Oh that was Partner's Day. That was for those who have partnered with the ministry and pledged a monthly donation or tithe." After owning up to how I went when I shouldn't have and everything they were more than okay with it and just told me I had gotten an "extra blessing". True that. I honestly don't know if I would have made it this far without it.
Also OP, don't feel too bad. God doesn't want you held down by your mistakes. The past is the past. The best you can do is learn from it. Anything more is holding you down, and that's the Devil. It doesn't make it right but as much as the past counts, the future does even more. And how much more so when the future does not bear any resemblance to your past mistakes but are actually GOOD, wonderful acts? Don't let unforgiveness snuff out any of your potential. And that goes for whatever side you are on in any transgression, right or wrong. God wants forgiveness on both sides of the coin because either way it hurts you and that's not the goal. Don't let any wounds fester in your soul. Move on and become greater than any who would hold you down, even yourself right now, would ever allow and so much more.