I've had exactly this. Please excuse the long post but this is a letter I sent to the school. I'm ex Forces and will not stand for my boy being made out to be in the wrong for standing up for himself.

On Wednesday the 21st October during first lesson, Connor was involved in a violent altercation with another boy, Tom McAvoy. Having discussed the incident with Connor this is his version of events.

Connor has said that he asked Tom if he could borrow a highlighting pen to which Tom said yes.

Connor started to use the pen and then for whatever reason, Tom decided he wanted the pen back. He said “give me the pen back” Connor said “ok wait” but before Connor could give the pen back, Tom grabbed Connor by the collar and violently pulled him off his chair.

Connor reacted to this aggression by flipping a table that was between the boys, Tom then said “aww do you wanna fight then” Connor then moved around the table and punched Tom in the face, causing a split in his cheek. This resulted in a fist fight where both boys threw a number of punches.

The whole incident including Tom violently pulling Connor from his chair was witnessed by Luke and McKenzie. Miss Algeo separated the boys and stopped the incident. Connor then threw the highlighting pen back at Tom.

We have spoken to Connor with regards to his behaviour and his actions, and we have reiterated the fact that we do not condone starting fights, or bullying or picking on anyone else for any reason whatsoever, we do however fully support Connor standing up for himself and when faced with an act of aggression, and when threatened we support his decision to reply with a reasonable and proportionate level of force.

We have spoken with Connor about flipping the table as this may have caused injury to another child, and he has agreed that this was a mistake. He has shown that he is upset by the incident and understands that flipping the table is not acceptable behaviour, We have also spoken to him and expressed our support that he continue to stand up for himself and not allow himself to be a victim, and to be threatened and intimidated by other people.

We are confident that he has got the message, and we wish to express our sincere thanks to Miss Algeo for getting between the 2 boys.