Getting married. Its a long complicated process that rivals the likes of even Rube Goldberg.
First you have to find a girl and i swear to god its like hunting in the African Sahara. You don't go for the 10's because they are the hardest to chase down, but you also don't want the sick or old, you want something in its prime.
Ok so now you have the girl spotted, you have to talk to her. All the days of pissing yourself talking to the cute girl in High school have not gone for nothing! You work up the nerve to talk to her and.... puts you down like the animal you are. Repeat step 1 until she actually talks to you, you miserable freak.
Ok Now you got it. Shes talking to you. The trick here is to not bring up how you spent 3000+ hours on warcraft or that you cosplay for comic con, you got to be suave. Its working, now carfully ask for her number.
You call later that night and on the other end is some old woman from Ukraine. Fake number. Repeat step 2 you complete waste of a human being.
You FINALLY got a good number, now ask her out on a date. What? Golden Corral will not work with such a lady, its got to be fancy like Taco Bell or Walmart. Yes of course! She agrees and you are supposed to pick her up at 7. Put on your favorite fedora and off you go!
...Into miserable failure. Who would of guessed she turned dryer than California at the sight of a very obvious MRA. Repeat all previous steps.
Ok you got it now, 2nd, 3rd, 4th dates all finished. You like this girl and she likes you. She hints she wants to go back to your place. Oh shit, do you have condoms! but what if you are just over reacting and she doesn't actually want to bone you? Oh fuck it whatever, just tell her you're steril. Congradulations, you're 25, just lost your virginity, and you blew your load in under thirty seconds. Maybe its better to be alone forever and let your family name die off.
But she says she ok with it! she cleans herself up, tells you "we can try again next time," and waddles back to her house. Fist pumps for everybody!
Years pass and shes moved in with you. You bone regularly and everything is great.... until she sees someone else. The dude looks like a porn star, owns a mustang and boat, and takes many trips to Europe. She leaves you for him.
Give up or repeat all previous steps.
One day you find yourself on one knee, proposing to the girl you love. She reaches down with one hand, the other covering her mouth, "I'm a lesbian."
Fuck it i'm done, in this case suicide is easier.