I can relate to your post. . ... Sometimes I wake up in the morning and wonder if this is the same world I went to sleep in. Everything feels plastic and polluted. I'm not sure if reality is real. I feel lonely but work consumes my entire self, repetitive tasks on the computer, pushing the same buttons doing the same things day after day, and all I have left is to stair into the TV screen listening go strangers I've never met speak monologs on yourube because I never leave my house anymore since the world changed. . unless to see an old friend for coffee or something so I can hear about how horrible the opposite sex is treating them lately or the lack there of. We can buy things to cover up our feelings but not without the sweat of some suffering third world's persons life attached to it. Our food is full of chemicals and the water is full of questionable things. Even if you are pretty and you love someone it doesn't matter because there's someone better who want to use them and discard them. And if they like you because your pretty then your replaceabke. . So then they leave you eventually for the next shinny pretty thing. Then your left over. You work all your life just to see that the system rigged. You'll never really own anything because the housing market is really only for rich people. And death. I wonder I'd i am immortal or of i am about to die in my sleep and doesnt it all just end there. I'm tired and my body doesn't want to do it again. I know people but I feel irrelevant. Don't hate attractive people not all of them are happy or comfortable in their own skin some are terrified because of the evil things they have experience because of the way you look. While also obsessing over every precieved flaw because they are convince that being attractive is the only reason someone will love them. And also everyone hates the attractive person. They inspire controlling and jealous behaviors in there partners. It can not make you want to exist in the world. It can make you feel vulnerable and scared. I had some really close calls with death that I wanted away from. Like car crashes, over doses, violent boyfriends, etc. And if this is hell then I wouldn't be surprised of I am already dead. If I am dead. Then I could see this being hell. To be honest if shifting is real things took a drastic turn for me at some point. I don't know. Nothing surprises me anymore. Aliens, etc. People are off the rails. It's like the scene in brave new world in the ending with all the onlookers.