Hey there! Sorry your sex drive and life are lack-luster.

It seems there are a few things going on here, but first and foremost, you should seek out and talk to a sex therapist about your difficulties. Many women have similar triggers / tricks to get them to orgasm that kind of work universally. I'd say about 4/5 women I've been with often have similar "buttons" or erogenous zones that, with a little work and luck, can trigger them into orgasm within the first 5-10min of sex. The foreplay as you mentioned is a huge must for many women, and unfortunately most men in their 20's still have no clue what they're doing in the bedroom on this end. Sticking with partners that aren't hasty and take their time with you is a key point in this.

Don't be afraid to explore different options as well with foreplay. Have you tried vibrators or other electrically stimulating toys on your nipples and other erogenous zones? Have you tried taking the time to stimulate yourself, slowly, at your own pace with toys? Explore your body and what feels good for you. One of my favorite "buttons" I have found with several women is the top left or right side of the hips. Applying direct but gentle pressure (such as pressing with one or two fingers and moving them in slow, small circles while pressing inward) in this area performs a couple of functions: a) it's unexpected because you simply aren't used to having any pressure (most people never have pressure applied here by another person) and catches you a little off-guard. You should have a partner try this with you standing up (make sure the bed is behind you and there's room for you to safely collapse onto it), and ideally the reaction is that you should twitch away from it as a reflex. If that happens, have the partner work on massaging these areas for you until you're more familiar with the range of sensations, run a vibrator over them etc. And b), work on stimulating in a similar manner other parts of your body. Light touches / slow, light strokes with finger tips, vibrators etc on your shoulders, neck, base of the rear of your scalp, backs of your knees etc can be extremely sensitive erogenous zones.

I could probably hand out more advice but give these things a shot over the next couple of weeks / months and see where they get you. Once you have a partner that's more familiar with stimulating you in alternative manners and locations, and you're comfortable with these alternative methods, you could possibly see some improvement.

And remember, try to get your headspace relaxed before beginning any sexual interaction. Warm bath or shower and removing distractions beforehand are basics that should always be considered.

Good luck!