Talk to her. Easy said, harder to do. My SO feels like you do and gradually over the last few years has opened up to me more and more about it. I can't say it hasn't caused some angst. I worried that he was secretly gay and that I'd been making a full of myself for the past X number of years. He assures me that he is attracted to women sexually and romantically but his fantasy is to be fucked by a big, groomed cock. He wants to feel what I feel during sex. We have tried pegging but he still has his fantasy of a man fucking him till he (the man inside him) cums. To be honest as a fantasy I find it hot. I like to think about it. We watch gay porn together and we can talk about whether he would like to be fucked by that guy, or that one. As a fantasy we talk about me watching him get fucked in real life and I think that sounds pretty hot too. When I think about the reality of it I find it pretty scary. What if he enjoyed it more than fucking me? He likes to be submissive and I think he'd get what he craved far easier with a man. But what we have is love and I feel so emotionally close to him for sharing this with me. I think men are so afraid of being labelled 'gay' as they grow up. His friends aren't stupid thugs or anything but I still think it would take a brave guy to have come out as any form of bisexual or heteroflexible with them. I'd like to get to a point where he can live out his fantasy without it breaking my heart but I don't think I'm there yet. I have logical thoughts about sex and body autonomy but they are at odds with my emotional reaction which was to cry a lot when he thought about exploring it for real!