Organization: not as much fun as it sounds! I've mentioned this elsewhere, but spotted hyenas in particular have some rather interesting reproductive habits. You really don't want to know.

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Still here? Fine, I'll tell you, but when you can't sleep tonight you'll have no one to blame but yourself. Last chance to abandon ship.

Contrary to popular belief, wolves don't naturally have a social hierarchy; there's a mated pair, their adorable puppies, and that's about it. (This changes in captivity. Think normal human society vs. prison.) Hyenas, however, do. And it sucks.

Male hyenas spend their lives cowering from their female counterparts. The moment that a female hyena is born, it's already higher-ranking than the alpha male. She'll enforce this by biting, stealing food, and just generally being unpleasant. Hyenas have an alarming amount of testosterone pumping through their veins, which I'm sure doesn't help the situation. In fact, they have so much testosterone that it starts doing some strange things to their anatomy. Take a look at this. Yes, that's a female. Yes, that's connected to its uterus. I'm sure you can do the math as the horrific implications of that sink into your brain, but I'm going to elaborate anyway because I enjoy feeding off your tears.

Good news: hyena rape is physically impossible. (I mean, it wouldn't be possible anyway, since female hyenas are so vicious, but I digress.) Bad news: the reason that hyena rape is impossible is that they have to have sex through a one-inch pseudopenis that points in the worst possible direction for that particular activity. But wait, it gets worse. Sex leads to babies, and babies have to come out somewhere, and unfortunately hyenas haven't figured out how to pull off C-sections or anesthesia, so the poor hyena has to give birth through that. Needless to say, mortality rates are sky-high for first-time mothers and even worse for firstborn cubs. Things improve a bit if the mother survives the first birth (which here means they subject themselves to this more than once), but you can't really get around the fact they're trying to shove an egg through a soda bottle, if eggs could suffocate halfway through and soda bottles could feel pain.

And yet they somehow have continued to perpetuate the species, while pandas won't screw even if we give them panda porn and raise their kids for them.